Monday, June 4, 2012

I Am Hungry People

   Well, I survived the busy chaotic weekend, and managed to stay nutritionally intact. It was however, not without many challenges and many self talks. My daughters graduation went swimmingly, I still can't believe she graduated. It seems like yesterday we were playing with her dolls. I did shed some tears, she's a woman now and not a little girl. Friday night was her ceremony and we had to eat dinner at 4:30 in the afternoon. Needless to say by the time graduation was over and we were headed home it was about 10:00 and we were all starving again. We stopped and grabbed a sub from Subway, and though I still managed to stay in range on calories, my sodium was through the roof that day. Saturday, I packed up and headed to the park to reserve our spot for the party at 10:30 in the morning (party @1) I forgot to eat my breakfast so yeah I'm a little hungry. I was dreading lunch because it was BBQ hamburgers and hot dogs. I wanted to be a part of the group so I fit a hamburger and a bun into the calorie budget, and with miracle whip it was a whopping 530 calories. I figured I had better stay away from anything else there other than the few pieces of fruit that I had (grapes, and melon). Man O Man did I want a piece of that cake. That cake has been
taunting me this ENTIRE weekend. I did cave and have A bite which was a mistake because now I only want more. I have been successful so far at beating down the voice in my head that says "eat me". I do think though that the 6 or so pieces left on the counter should disappear quickly before my resolve to not eat it caves in. All food temptations aside, I thoroughly enjoyed the party and got to see many faces I had not seen in quite awhile, sort of a mini friend/family reunion. When I got home Saturday night and began to finally relax a little I noticed that my ankle was starting to hurt a bit (muscles I think) anyway by morning it looked like I had shoved a softball inside it. While it does not hurt to stand on it, at all, bending it when I walk is quite painful. It is strange because I do not recall hurting it in anyway. In a way I do wish I had remembered so that I would know what to avoid in the future. Who knows.... It may make Zumba a little interesting this week though. I think for today I will try keeping it up and see if it improves.
     Sunday was fast Sunday at church so no food until at least 3 or in my case 4 cause that's when church gets out. I grab a fiber bar on my way out the door to my Mom's to celebrate my brothers birthday. I was going to grill a piece of chicken for myself before we left because dinner was sloppy joes and macaroni salad, I did not have time to do this so now I have to fit this meal into my calorie budget. People, I am STARVING, or at least it feels like it. All these calorie expensive meals are not allowing me to eat much and my belly is telling me so! I eat the meal they have so graciously provided, but in the back of my head I just want to eat, I am still hungry.... and there is ANOTHER cake and ice cream to avoid. Normally, I would have allowed for a little bit of a cheat but 299.8 does not leave a lot of wiggle room if I want to avoid being over 300 pounds. I refuse to go back there. I was a good girl and waited until I got home to eat something to fill me up and take up the rest of my calorie budget. I feel so yucky when my diet consists of junk food, even when it does fit in the calorie range. It is a far cry from the way I used to eat, and thinking about this I am proud of myself. I am glad that junk makes me feel gross now because it used to be all I ate. Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with SOME junk on OCCASION, but trying to fit it in just does not seem worth it anymore, especially when it is going to result in a tummy ache.
     Today I am super grateful to be back to my normal menu, I can finally eat and feel full and not gross. Ahhhh.... relief. This week should also not be quite as busy, at least after laundry day is over, and I have finished cleaning up the mess in my house from this weekend. Bonus... The little one starts summer school today and will be gone for 3 hours so I will have a little bit of a break! I will check in again before the weekly report I am sure. I hope you all had a fabulous weekend !!!!
Back Row L-R: Sarah (our eldest), Daniel (my hubby), Me
Front: Sandee (my mom), Becky (our youngest)


9 comments:

  1. What a gorgeous family!!
    I know exactly what you mean. It is sometimes so hard to find something at a party that fits in with the way you're trying to eat.
    But you did great because you really are worth it and congrats on getting to twoterville :)

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  2. Hi Brandie! I found you via SITS Girls. I left a comment there telling you I would be by to read and follow, and here I am! I have enjoyed reading your blog and seeing the photos of your beautiful family. Please drop by and visit me when you have the time. I wish you the very best in your on-going health challenge. It is a battle I have waged for almost my entire life, so I know whereof you speak, even though I seldom if ever actually blog about it - although i have written a couple of poems over the last 2-1/2 years of my writer's blog. I have only recently begun my photography blog, which I also invite you to visit.

    Thank you for creating this forum topic!

    Paula

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  3. I know what you mean about the cake! My mother had her birthday a few weeks ago, and I got to the point where I said the leftover cake had to go. It was screaming my name too loud to ignore.

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  4. I wrote a nice long comment here and it was lost. That is what happens frequently when Blogger and WordPress collide! They apparently are at war with one another when it comes to commenting! LOL

    In any event I found you via SITS girls forum. I don't blog about weight loss and healthy lifestyles, but I do read them, and I know I will enjoy reading yours. I have been working on maintaining a rather large weight loss for the past 2+ years, and I am currently fighting a losing (or should I say gaining) battle? I am hoping to gain some support from reading your blog. Plus prayer support is always appreciated and offered as well.

    You are of course invited to visit either or both of my blogs - a writer's blog and a photography blog. I have signed up to follow you and I look forward to reading about your journey. You have a beautiful family! I know you must be proud.

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  5. I see now that my first comment was published! Oh well - now you have three (count 'em) THREE comments from me in one day! LOL

    Paula

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  6. Popping by from SITS... Sounds like you're doing an awesome job, and I love that you're sharing your experiences so that others can learn from them!

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  7. SUZI, Thank you for the wonderful comment, it is great being in "twoterville" LOL. I only pray that my weigh in on Friday puts me further in that category.
    PAULA, I enjoyed all of your comments, and have checked out your pages as well. I am running a little scattered on time today but I will be back on them tomorrow to leave comments as well. I love photography and poetry, even dabble in them a little. I have had writers block for a bit though so haven't written any lately. Maybe you could be my inspiration there. :)
    KRISTIN, I have come to the conclusion that birthday cakes are evil. At least they speak evil to me. That one is still in my fridge and hasn't gone anywhere. Perhaps I will follow suit and dump mine also. LOL
    KIM, Thank you for stopping by and for the awesome comment. I am assuming since you came from SITS that you are a fellow blogger... May I ask what type of blog you have? Have I already followed it?

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  8. This is amazing! You are doing such an incredible thing! Such an inspiration! And PS Cake is my downfall too!

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    1. Thank you Sarah! I am happy to report the left over cake remained untouched. I am throwing it out today!! This makes me real happy :)

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